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This site has been created by Labour Party supporters and enthusiasts to help explain the true nature of our policies and what we are trying to achieve.

We are also providing valuable resources for Labour canvassers, who are often asked awkward questions on the doorstep. Hopefully, this site will provide you with everything you need to give as good as you get from the small number of stupid people out there who don’t understand our policies on immigration, the economy, and why we are at war.

New!!! Visit our Ask Gordon section (formerly ‘Ask Tony’) , to have your questions answered by our very own Labour Agony Uncle, and Testimonials from satisfied voters (mostly ethnic minorities).

For the latest updates see below.

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	30 July: A letter to Uncle Gordon from yet another lucky winner of a fabulous council house.

		Letter writer wins council house!

On 29 July we handed over the keys to a fantastic 5 bedroom council house in fashionable west London, to Etongy Charlemagne Macdonald, writer of our ‘letter of the week’ (See below). Etongy has graciously accepted the property we offered him and has even penned a letter of ‘tanks’. Etongy already has 3 council houses, but, we are pleased to award him another, if only to save it from being allocated accidentally to a white British family!

We are touched by Etongy’s (highly unusual) gratitude, so much so that we have reproduced his letter in full below, and awarded him ANOTHER countil house!! Thanks, Etongy!

Hey Honky Tonk,

Dat is tooly de best ting since Me and da bruvas come heerz ta colonize yo loovin I-land. Ize joost wantin ta mention, can I ave a hot howse so as I can growdem plantains (me want chilli oslo), because I wants to need it fo me cookin pot, ta make a new recipe for poor white people ta keep dem warm when that white stuff fall down in the street in cold paart o de year. Some times they call it snow, but sometimes me calls it white people. Dem is a ittle bit like snow, hey man, we joost licks dem and dem melt,turn to water and go away. I is considerin makin dis cooltaur betta wif me ere.

.Me knows so, becoz now I put de sofa, in de front garden, peorple can come and sit and chat 24/8.

My people back home, hear me tellin dem stories, and they can't believe how stoopid goovarnmant here is. Truly loovin me oop big thyme dance hall fun.

Me want ta have at least high five bedroom, ittle bit somethin for wakin big soond system,
ta help wake up me white neighbors so as dem caan go workin, if dem not too lazy ta find
a job between da Polish white bruvas, whose dem tellz me is really tick in da head always
a carryin on wwif de foony lingo and ating something like wool. I look one day and smell it.
I don't want no cabbage like dat growin in me niw allotedment.

When yous people hier, can speaks to me like I speaks so well, den maybe we can get togetha, in me new haus man. Only ting is, me donts wants no honky tonks in me hood.




		Etongy’s fourth coucil house: Yet another property which white British people will never be allowed to live in! Fantastic!!

OK. Tank you labour party, four everyting under de sun, and me mamma sleeps good tonight.
I would kiss ya all, but - like I tell dem white girls, I is frightened o gettin da HGV, so I need lots of HTO(warta) to make a magic with. Tiz funny, da wayz o science and high teconologically higher tinkin. Like me. Havin ta explain dese tings to undereducated simple people whoze don't underthink local groovarnment.

Kazoomo - bakalinte- nasa - a'jembe Som nom naa Honki tonk

Etongy

26 July 2008: Letter of the week: Win a council house!


	The rising cost of forged passports: We take action!

Dear Gordon,

The prices four the passport I had from Ghana was very very mooch cheapa den dem is chargin for me nowadaze. I had been tinkin I might appeal to the GLC, for some kind of a discount card to force the creative people in the publishing biznassto consider a faira system to enable our logistics - mor flexibility.

When me brutha arrives here in six months, I want to be able to shew him just how, If we fight for our rites (and no, I don't meen voodoo ones - but we do like to cut up and burn our nephews on loan, if we get carried away in our trances) we can become even more important, especially when you have the matching diamond hear rings, an inkredible stupid white girlfriend, and maybe even insurance on the car I don't have likense four driving on the wrong side of the track of conkrete.

I keep on telling them, yes, everything is free here, and when you make alot of




	The cost of a forged British Passport is rising fast.

money wit the international fraud development fund, we can all go back home one day and take all of it back to home, and all of the neighboors will want to come ova to be slaves, because I am so great. We can tell stories aboot how the stupid English women and men are crazy, all night long by the fire.

I will run for province mP, with the tricks of the trade, taut me by Labour, I know how they do it, I need a Jewish money launderer to fund all me expensives. Dem say, heyas is a gift, and more come again. Them want some favor some time back, so I will let them have me niece, and we can have a party of bush meat. Oh, dat reminds me. Me auntie is tellin me Aunti M'Bendy has recieved the monkey and a brace of gorilla feet, for when we circumsize me daughta Wednesday.

Please, get back to me about the expensives please. This state of uncertainty must need to b dealt with a shoort, shark, chop.

Be mine,

Entongy Charlemagne McDonald

Dear Etongy

Thank you for bringing this problem to our attention. We are particularly concerned that if the cost of forged passports becomes unaffordable to the masses, then a huge number of potential Labour voters will be prevented from coming here and helping to keep us in power, which would be a disaster for us and all our supporters.

As a result, we are organising a system of grants and subsidies to help fund forged documents for foreigners, and will allow an unlimited budget for this, even if it means that we don’t have enough taxpayer’s money left to help pensioners pay their fuel bills, or fund the health service. Your happiness is our priority!

For bringing this issue to our attention, and as writer of our ‘Letter of the Week’, we have decided to award you a fantastic council house, and unlimited benefits for the rest of your life. We always reward our friends.

Gordon

P.S. If you needs diss ansah in de pidgin english, juss like you speaks, you just sen’ me an email to tell me dat, bro. We nevah minds peayin’ for de translatah!

6 July 2008: Fantastic website hosting news

An urgent appeal from Uncle Gordon on behalf of the Nation.

We need your help! Last month this site ran out of bandwidth, and as a result, people all over the world were deprived of the opportunity to read about the Labour Party, how wonderful we are, and how our sacred mission to destroy the indigenous working white community in the United Kingdom is progressing.

To prevent this appalling tragedy occuring again, we need your help. Do you have access to a web server, with at least 2Gb of bandwidth available? Would you be able to provide an FTP site with unlimited access? If so, please get in touch.

We should point out that anyone who does not wish to assist will be arrested and sent to prison, for at least 42 days, so it’s in your own interests to co-operate. You have been warned!

For more information email us at bandwidth@thelabourparty.org.uk


	02 June 2008: Another letter for Gordon, our fabulous Labour Party ‘agony uncle’.

	Dear Gordon I no happy. You said if I cum to Britain from Pakistan an vote Labour, you give me everything I want but not case. Yes I get four big council house for all wives and thirty seven kids, free health care, and welfare cheques, but not enough. There no Mosque in area you send me. I have to get Infidel transport and it take twenty minutes to arrive at local mosque. I also complain about white people. When I get on bus to go to Mosque with all forty two family, they give dirty looks, complain about smelling curry, and they not give up seats to superior Muslim. This racist! You told me no racism in Britain. Why is no Muslim only bus service? And why no Mosque where I am? Two churches, no Mosque. Why you not shut down and replace with mosque? You not bend over backward far enough for me! Asif Azmel Sedgefield

	*Dear Asif* *Good grief! Why on earth did you not tell us earlier about your terrible suffering before? Twenty minutes to the Mosque and no dedicated Muslim transport!* We have discovered that there is an old age home near to where you live, which we plan to turn in to mosque as soon as possible, and will implement your fabulous idea of Muslim only buses, so you can remain completely separate from the revolting white community, who you, like us, utterly despise, as soon as we possibly can. Rest assured, we in the Labour Party will do anything we can to get that wonderful Islamic ‘block vote’, and would not only bend over backwards, but forwards so that you and all Muslims can fk us (and all British taxpayers) up the ae if that’s what it takes. *Gordon*

24 May 2008: Another letter for Gordon, our fabulous Labour Party ‘agony uncle’.

Dear Uncle Gordon

In my area, all the sellers of the 'Big Issue' are foreign, (mostly Romanian Gipsies). Isn't it wonderful how, even

in this industry, they have undercut local labour, and are helping to increase sales of this fabulous publication, and hence boost the economy by creating work for printers and journalists.

Steve, Crystal Palace

Dear Steve

How wonderful to read of examples of how immigrants, through their enterprise and hard work, are contributing to the economy, and displacing even the homeless indigenous population by denying them a livelihood. After all, foreigners receive massive state handouts, including free housing, but they are still willing to work, even though they don't need to.

I regret that, unless the local white working class homeless




		Immigrant Big Issue sellers: A huge contribution to the economy.


	scum can develop a sense of enterprise and hard work, they will starve to death on the streets, and I, for one, will not mourn their loss. Gordon

24 May 2008: Another letter for Gordon, our fabulous Labour Party ‘agony uncle’.

Dear Uncle Gordon

I very worry. I coming next week to the England for the free house and everyting, but I see that in local and by election, Conservative party win. Will black people like me still get free houses and can come to UK no problem, no border control?

Ahmad, Mogadishu

Dear Ahmad

Don't worry: Both the Labour and Conservative parties share exactly the same objectives:

To make rich people richer by bringing in unlimited amounts of cheap labour from the third world.
To displace and destroy the indigenous white working population, and
To devote the majority our time in office to 'personal enrichment'.

As a result, I can confidently state that our borders will remain uncontrolled, and all state resources, such as housing, health care, education, etc, will be continue to be allocated to dark skinned and foreign folk, no matter which of our two parties is in office.

We have now entered a fabulous new era in British politics, where ordinary people have been effectively disenfranchised, because no matter who they vote for, nothing will change, so rest assured, a warm welcome and a free council




	Good news for foreigners: Uncle David, Conservative, has EXACTLY the same policies as us, so unlimted immigration will continue.

house await you from the moment you step off your plane in the UK, with your false passport in one hand and your other hand outstreched awaiting your first taxpayer funded handout.

Gordon

25 April 08: Another letter for Gordon, the Labour Party ‘agony uncle’.

Dear Uncle Gordon

I was just thinking while reading the news the other day, just how similar Robert Mugabe’s Zanu PF in Zimbabwe, and our own wonderful Labour Party are to each other. To illustrate my point, have a look at the table I have created, which shows this very well, I’m sure you will agree:

Zanu PF	Nu-Labour PF
Hates white people of British origin and is and is working hard to make them leave the country.	Hates white people of British origin and is working hard to make them leave the country.
Uses ‘war veterans’ to displace white people from their farms and homes.	Uses immigrants to displace white people from their council estates and homes.
Rigs elections	Rigs elections
Has created a system of civil repression so that people are afraid to publicly speak their minds in case they are arrested.	Has created a system of civil repression so that people are afraid to publicly speak their minds in case they are arrested.
Use their position in government as an opportunity for personal enrichment (stealing), at the expense of the entire population	Use their position in government as an opportunity for personal enrichment (stealing), at the expense of the entire population
Will not listen to reason and believe that they are invincible	Will not listen to reason and believe that they are invincible
Say that they are socialists but have instituted policies which have made the vast majority of the population even poorer than before they came in to power.	Say that they are socialists but have instituted policies which have made the vast majority of the population even poorer than before they came in to power.
Have instituted detention without trial and officially sanctioned torture as a means of neutralising all political opposition.	Have instituted detention without trial and officially sanctioned torture as a means of neutralising all political opposition.
Solves the nation’s financial problems by printing more money, thereby ultimately making the country’s currency worthless. ($1=Zim$250000000000)	Solves the nation’s financial problems by printing more money, thereby ultimately making the country’s currency worthless. (Northern Rock £100 billion,, £50 billion created to bail out banks).

As you can see, Gordon, the resemblance between your regime and that of Robert Mugabe is uncanny, so much so that I have a suggestion for you: Why not re-name our party Zanu Nu-Labour, or even Nu-Labour PF? That way, ordinary folks would immediately comprehend the proud political tradition of the party, and would far more easily understand the reasons why Labour (PF) governs the way it does.

Robert, Orpington






		Spot the difference: Left: Robert Gabriel Mugabe: Socialist president of Zimbabwe. Right: Gordon Brown, socialist prime minister of Bongo Bongo Land. (formerly the United Kingdom).

	*Dear Robert (no relation to our friend in Zimbabwe I hope!)* Thanks for your letter and yes, you are absolutely correct. We in the Labour Party have great admiration for Robert Mugabe, a war hero and socialist, who has clung on to power for nearly 30 years, and we have modelled our regime on on his wonderfully successful period in office. It is indeed gratifying to know that even ordinary folks can now spot the similarities between our two regimes. We will definitely consider your suggestion of a change of name, with my preference being Nu-Labour PF. It trips off the tongue nicely. *For writing this month’s star letter, you win a council house (as long as you are dark skinned or foreign) Congratulations!!* *Gordon*

21 March 2008: Important ‘enrichment of diversity’ community relations news.

The word ‘Muslim’ is not to be used as an expletive.

We have been receiving disturbing reports from all over the country that the word ‘Muslim’ is being used as a replacement for the usual four letter Anglo-Saxon terms that we have all come to know and love. An example was a 15 year old student in Bolton, who was heard to say, I’m just going to the toilet to have a quick Muslim’, and a motorist in Poole, who, on being forced to take evasive action by another vehicle, shouted out, ‘You Muslim’ at the offending driver.

We are, quite naturally, appalled by this. As we have always said, all Muslims are lovely, lovely Labour voting people who, through the wonders of the enrichment of diversity, bring us unlimited joy and happiness.

They only ever engage in acts of violence if anyone criticicises them, or fails to give in to their demands, and we are committed to allowing millions more of them in to our country, so that even more of us can experience this utterly wonderful loveliness, so this use of ‘Muslim as a swear word has to stop!

We will shortly be bringing in legislation which will outlaw the use of the words, ‘Muslim’, ‘Islamic’ and ‘Terrorist’ in any kind of perjorative sense, and, by the use of phone taps and microphones, will detect, and arrest the perpetrators, and put them in prison, where they belong. You have been warned!

REMEMBER: UNCLE GORDON IS WATCHING YOU!




	An example of Islamic loveliness. Anyone using the word ‘Muslim as an expletive will be sent to prison, where they belong.

17 Feb 2008: Fantastic unlimited immigration news.


	Immigrants: Even their shit is superior!

Great news for all Labour Party Supporters! Conclusive proof that our policy of uncontrolled, unlimited immigration is justified, and one in the eye for all those appalling racist fascist nazi thug BNP supporters out there! An analysis of fecal matter obtained from foreigners and dark skinned people, particularly muslims, proves beyond doubt that their excrement is VASTLY SUPERIOR to the filthy, disgusting crap that white indigenous people produce, and a fabulous tribute to us and the marvellous multicultural paradise we have created in the last 10 years!

We were first alerted to this wonderful news by a story in the press that two lovely foreigners were selling chocolate cake smeared with faeces in Cardiff. (Click HERE for full story).

Subsequently, hundreds Labour Party supporters have told us that they, too, find that foreign shit is delicious, and they use their dung as a cheap, nutritious and tasty ingredient in all kinds of dishes, prepared in their restaurants and in foods sold to British people everywhere.

Our research shows that, while white faeces, is revolting, has no value at all, is a public health hazard, and is something to be dealt with and removed from our council estates (and even our country) as quickly as possible, foreign shit is wonderfully tasty, fragrant, and has a chocolate like consistency. This would explain its prolific use in foreign recipes, particulary where the food created is to be sold to white people.




		Above: Foreign faeces: Delicious, like chocolate.




	White indigenous dung: Malodorous, disgusting, and a public health hazard.

Further research has revealed that this phenomenon has been known about for years by the water utilities, who have found that the current infrastructure is inadequate to deal with foreigner’s faeces.

A spokesman for the Water Companies Association of England and Wales said, ‘The huge mass of immigrants in the past few years have put a huge strain on our underground pipes and sewers, and has resulted in us being forced to spend billions of pounds of taxpayer’s money renewing them Allied to this is the fact that immigrant excrement has a completely different, taste, smell and texture to white dung. Quite frankly, we are not surprised that foreign folks are adding the stuff to cakes and curries, and I am sure the results are absolutely mouth watering.’

Remember, next time you tuck in to a scrumptious shit smeared chocolate cake, lovingly prepared for you by our fantastic foreign friends, that it was the Labour Party who were responsible for this massive influx of foreign fecal matter, and, rest assured, we plan to allow many, many more fabulous foreigners to come to our country, so in the future all you white folks will have even more opportunities to experience immigrant shit. Fantastic!!

28 December 2007: Another letter for Gordon, our fabulous Labour Party ‘Agony Uncle’.

Dear Uncle Gordon

I live in Crewe, a town which has a massive, and growing Polish community, which, of course, is absolutely wonderful, and I feel enriched by their fantastic culture, particularly their capacity to consume massive quantities of alcohol, their highly entertaining drunken violence, and the way they enjoy themselves and party noisily all night. I also love the way 50 of them can live happily in a 2 bedroomed house!

My problem is, I am unemployed, and every time I apply for a job, I am told that I have no chance of being hired unless I speak Polish. In desperation, I have decided to learn the language, but our local college of further education wants £500 per term, which I can't afford.

I have heard that your government is spending millions of pounds providing free English Language courses for foreigners, so I wondered if it might be possible for you to do the opposite, and provide financial assistance to people like me who, as a result of your incredibly succesful policy of uncontrolled immigration, now lack the necessary Polish language skills to be employable in the United Kingdom.

Colin, Crewe

Dear Colin

As you know, the sole purpose of the Labour Government is to provide resources to foreign and dark skinned people, ourselves at every opportunity, and, of course, the business community, not the indigenous white population. As a result, we will not under any circumstances fund training programmes which would assist you or other white working British people to become more employable,